Moving towards independence
Sometimes young adults with DLD need help with their transition to independence. For example, with moving out and starting their career. This help can come from acquaintances or organisations. Finding assistance can be a journey in itself. What help is available?
Independent living
Does your child with DLD want to move out? That is a big step for any child and parent. For someone with DLD, it can be even bigger. Young adults with DLD are less likely to live independently and more likely to live with their parents. Sometimes this is because of the housing market and high costs. It may also be related to a lack of confidence to live on their own.
A lot of information about living independently can be hard to understand. For example, information on how to register for housing or housing allowance. Therefore, your child might need extra assistance when taking the step to independent living.
TIPS
Advice from young adults with DLD who live independently:
- Ask for help with searching and interpreting information
- When practicing new things, have someone watch and help you
- Find your own space, but occasionally eat at your parents’ house
When young adults with DLD already live independently, they might still need more help. For example, with chores or paperwork. A small percentage of young adults receives professional help.
The availability of support varies per municipality. You can find information about available assistance on your municipality website (the Dutch term voor municipality is gemeente). You may be eligible for help through the Social Support Act (the Dutch term is WMO). You can find information about this on the website of the Dutch government. You could also contact the municipality by phone or email to ask which help is available.
Work
On average, people with DLD obtain lower educational levels than people without DLD. They are also more likely to leave school without a diploma. Young adults with DLD more often work part-time jobs.
Work can be very tiring for people with DLD. There can be a lot of sensory stimuli at work. The pace set by colleagues might be too fast. Additionally, meetings can be challenging to follow.
TIPS
Tips from young adults with DLD:
- Use tools for planning, such as a weekly planner
- Dare to ask for what you need, such as repetition, a quiet space, or a mentor
- Set boundaries. For instance, one meeting per week is enough
- Allow yourself a time out now and then
Young adults with DLD might need help to find a suitable job. They also may need help with job applications or interviews. Contact your municipality for more information.
When your child has a job, keeping it can be challenging. Werkpad offers assistance for people with DLD who are looking for a job or need support at work. For instance, a job coach from Werkpad can help improve communication with colleagues or an employer.
Assistance from family
Some young adults with DLD prefer to ask their parents or sibling(s) for help. However, asking your family for help could also be uncomfortable. For the person with DLD, but also for the family member. For instance because:
- Young adults no longer want to depend on their parents or family member(s).
- Young adults want to choose which information is available to their family member(s). For example, which websites they visit or what they spend their money on.
- Parents want to let go of their children, but notice that they still need to stay close for assistance.
- Parents’ ability to help declines because they get older.
TIP
Discuss the pros and cons of asking family members for help with your child. Also discuss other possibilities.
Social contacts
Independence also involves establishing a social network. Some young adults with DLD feel lonely. The page Leisure time contains some tips to help your child finding social contacts.
Courses
For people with DLD up to the age of 23, several courses are available. For example on:
- what DLD is and how to cope with it (psycho-education, in Dutch: psycho-educatie)
- how to improve your communication skills
- how to talk about your emotions and how to deal with them
TIP
There are useful websites where your child can ask all sorts of questions. For example, about money or relationships. Check out steffie.nl or jongerenhulponline.
Information in English
English language resources on DLD are available from websites such as RADLD (UK), DLDandMe (US) and TheDLDProject (Australia). The UK-based charity Afasic provides a parent helpline. Harry’s Story is a picture book to create awareness of DLD.
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